{"id":213,"date":"2019-12-06T05:06:17","date_gmt":"2019-12-06T05:06:17","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/advent.starskyhutchcalendar.net\/2019\/calendar\/?p=213"},"modified":"2019-12-06T05:06:17","modified_gmt":"2019-12-06T05:06:17","slug":"december-6th-of-blue-skies-and-red-sweaters-by-spencer","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/advent.starskyhutchcalendar.net\/2019\/calendar\/?p=213","title":{"rendered":"December 6th- Of Blue Skies and Red Sweaters by Spencer"},"content":{"rendered":"

Note:<\/strong> If I could create fanvids (which I can\u2019t), I would set one to One Direction\u2019s Half a Blue Sky<\/a><\/em>. But I can write (I think) and so I wrote this little angsty Kira story based on that song instead.<\/span><\/p>\n

Starsky studied the miscellaneous collection of shirts, jackets and ties that had slowly accumulated on his bed. The police clothing drive was next week and he was determined to do his part. Anything to take his mind of off, well, everything. He just hadn\u2019t anticipated how the simple exercise of cleaning out his closet would also lead to a re-evaluation of his life.<\/span><\/p>\n

Every item had dredged up a memory, either for good or ill. The silk shirt given to him by an old girlfriend hell-bent on upgrading his style, a sporty corduroy jacket he\u2019d kept on hand for city council meetings and court hearings, a rainbow of ties now too wide for current fashion. Not that he\u2019d ever cared much about following trends. Perhaps that\u2019s why the girlfriend didn\u2019t last, Starsky mused darkly. Well, it was one reason anyway. Just not the most important one.<\/span><\/p>\n

And now his relationship with Kira was on the rocks, too.<\/span><\/p>\n

Starsky squeezed his eyes shut for a moment then turned back to his closet with an effort driven by sheer force of will. Or stubbornness. That was when a patch of scarlet caught his eye from beneath a dog-eared pile of Car and Driver magazines. He determined that the old periodicals would be the next to go as he tugged at the richly woven fabric. A cashmere sweater pulled free, V-necked and wide-collared and of a slightly higher quality than Starsky typically bought.<\/span><\/p>\n

Of course it was, since the sweater wasn\u2019t even his. It was Hutch\u2019s.<\/span><\/p>\n

When was the last time Starsky had worn it? He thought it might have been the night after Terry had died, when he and Hutch had sat on the kitchen floor playing Monopoly. The night they\u2019d first talked – drunk and teary-eyed – about leaving the police force together. Heading to Canada like a pair of wild geese on a north wind. The possibility of them going separate ways hadn\u2019t even been an option then.<\/span><\/p>\n

Starsky turned the sweater over in his hands taking comfort in its softness and warmth. He couldn\u2019t recall exactly how the thing had ended up in his closet. Although it wasn\u2019t so strange that it had. It wasn\u2019t the first piece of clothing he and Hutch had shared over the years. So many small, personal items had become interchangeable between them from their earliest days. Coffee cups, sunglasses, pencil nubs, slices of leftover pizza.<\/span><\/p>\n

Gradually the big things had become interchangeable as well. Family and friends. Hopes and dreams. Doubts and fears. And always, always, <\/em>their dependence on and trust in each other. Until it hadn\u2019t even mattered where one stopped and the other began.<\/span><\/p>\n

Until a woman named Kira split them apart.<\/span><\/p>\n

Now, even though Starsky and Hutch were technically still partners, they\u2019d come apart at the seams. They were as far apart as the earth from the stars in the night sky. And the space between them was just as cold and silent.<\/span><\/p>\n

Being here without you is like I’m waking up to
\nOnly half a blue sky
\nKinda there but not quite
\nI’m walking around with just one shoe
\nI’m half a heart without you
\nI’m half a man at best
\nWith half an arrow in my chest
\nI miss everything we do
\nI’m half a heart without you*<\/em><\/span><\/p>\n

How had they let it happen? Reliving the past weeks during endless nights when the darkness crushed in on him like stones, Starsky had come to accept that he was as much to blame by the rift as Hutch. Sure, Hutch had slept with Kira, but Starsky had read more into Kira\u2019s feelings for him than there had actually been. He\u2019d been quick to supply his own ending to their story while barely skimming the pages.<\/span><\/p>\n

The truth was, Starsky\u2019s feelings for Hutch had grown overwhelming in their intensity. He was terrified where they might lead. As a teen, Starsky had been sent clear across the country to escape the craziness of New York. Barely in his 20s, he\u2019d survived the horrors of war. Now he was desperate for a normal life. A normal love. Then Kira came along. Beautiful, passionate and ambitious, together they made a perfect storm.<\/span><\/p>\n

But Kira wasn\u2019t the heroine Starsky had made her out to be. He should have known there was no happily ever after in his future. Not with everything he\u2019d seen. Everything he\u2019d done. Everything he craved. And now he\u2019d lost them both. His lady and his soulmate. The later was far worse. Starsky knew that now.<\/span><\/p>\n

Starsky held the rumpled red sweater up to his face. The damn thing gave off more warmth than the woman ever did. He laid it against his cheek and breathed in its scent. It might just have been his imagination, but it even smelled<\/em> like Hutch. Fresh and clean and sexy. The way Hutch used to smell, anyway, before he let his hair – and everything else – go.<\/span><\/p>\n

Starsky lay down on the bed, pushing aside the mound of clothing. He held the red sweater against his chest like a child with a treasured toy. A magical guardian against terrors both within and without.<\/span><\/p>\n

\"\"<\/p>\n

So your friend’s been telling me
\nYou’ve been sleeping with my sweater
\nAnd that you can’t stop missing me
\nBet my friend’s been telling you
\nI’m not doing much better
\n‘Cause I’m missing half of me*<\/em><\/span><\/p>\n

That\u2019s how Huggy found Starsky late the next morning – sprawled across his bed, one blue Adidas hanging off his foot and one hand clinging to a red sweater.<\/span><\/p>\n

Hutch had been the one to let Huggy know Starsky hadn\u2019t shown up for work the next day. Circumstances being what they were, Hutch wasn\u2019t about to call the numbers his fingers were preprogrammed to dial or use the extra hidden key to let himself in to Starsky\u2019s. Instead, he resorted to calling on Huggy, pleading with him to check on Starsky in words raw with concern and regret. That he was hurting as much as Starsky was obvious.<\/span><\/p>\n

So Huggy had gone to Starsky\u2019s and let himself in with the key Hutch told him he would find. He\u2019d roused Starsky from the tangle of clothes and twisted bedding and sent him on his way, but not without a friendly lecture peppered with worldly wise advice.<\/span><\/p>\n

“You gotta talk to him, Hutch,\u201d Huggy urged Hutch later, repeating much the same words he\u2019d said to Starsky. \u201cI\u2019m tellin\u2019 you, that man is hurtin\u2019 like a junkie jonesin\u2019 for a hit. And you know how that<\/em> is,\u201d Huggy added, not holding back on a tacit taboo.<\/span><\/p>\n

When Hutch just glared at him, Huggy shook his head and tsked. \u201cI\u2019ve never seen two dudes who get off on inflicting so much pain on each other.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cYou think I wanted this to happen?\u201d Hutch responded bitterly. \u201cNobody\u2019s getting \u2018off\u2019 <\/em>Hug.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cMaybe that\u2019s the problem. Maybe you should <\/em>be. Just not with a bitch like Kira.\u201d When Hutch\u2019s expression turned from pained to stunned, Huggy smirked.”Ain\u2019t nothin\u2019 wrong with admitting your feelings. The world\u2019s not gonna end.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

As if Hutch\u2019s world hadn\u2019t ended already.<\/span><\/p>\n

Hutch\u2019s stony facade had shattered and he’d sunk down into the nearest chair. When he spoke, his voice was thick with long-suppressed emotion. \u201cIt\u2019s too late for that. Sometimes, Hug, I feel like I\u2019m missing half the sky. Starsky hates me.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cWhat Starsky hates is bein\u2019 without<\/em> you, even though he may not say it.\u201d Huggy laid a hand on Hutch\u2019s shoulder. \u201cI\u2019ve known you two long enough to know. Right now, it’s like he\u2019s half a man.\u201d Huggy removed his hand then and made to leave, but not before saying, \u201cCall him. Tell him you\u2019ll meet him on some neutral ground where you can talk. Hell, treat him to lunch. He\u2019s always easier to talk to with a full stomach.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI don\u2019t know \u2026.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Huggy\u2019s full-lipped grin turned into a grim line. \u201cMan – I never took you for a coward. Somebody\u2019s got to make the first move and in my book it’s got to be you. You\u2019re the one who crossed the line. You\u2019re the one who\u2026\u201c<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cOkay – I get it,\u201d Hutch snapped. But his vitriol was for himself. He knew Huggy was right.<\/span><\/p>\n

\"\"<\/p>\n

Forget all we said that night
\nNo, it doesn’t even matter
\n‘Cause we both got split in two
\nIf you could spare an hour or so
\nWe’ll go for lunch down by the river
\nWe can really talk it through.*<\/em><\/span><\/p>\n

Starsky surveyed the contents of his newly organized closet, thinking over his rearranged life. He had a big night ahead of him and wanted to get everything right, right down to his clothes.<\/span><\/p>\n

After a careful shave and splash of cologne, he put on a stark black turtleneck and skin-tight jeans that showed off his best assets. Just before he walked out the door, he pulled on a sleek black leather jacket, pushing past his well-worn brown one. That one, he\u2019d save for another day. He\u2019d bought the black for just this occasion. Starsky had always considered black leather sophisticated and sexy and he needed all the confidence he could get. Because tonight, Starsky was going to meet a gorgeous blond at Huggy\u2019s. And after that, who knew were the night would take them?<\/span><\/p>\n

*lyrics from Half a Blue Sky<\/em> recorded by One Direction<\/span><\/p>\n

\"\"<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Note: If I could create fanvids (which I can\u2019t), I would set one to One Direction\u2019s Half a Blue Sky. But I can write (I think) and so I wrote this little angsty Kira story based on that song instead. … Continue reading →<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[4,17,9],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-213","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-fic","category-preslash","category-sfw"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/advent.starskyhutchcalendar.net\/2019\/calendar\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/213","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/advent.starskyhutchcalendar.net\/2019\/calendar\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/advent.starskyhutchcalendar.net\/2019\/calendar\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/advent.starskyhutchcalendar.net\/2019\/calendar\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/advent.starskyhutchcalendar.net\/2019\/calendar\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=213"}],"version-history":[{"count":2,"href":"http:\/\/advent.starskyhutchcalendar.net\/2019\/calendar\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/213\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":237,"href":"http:\/\/advent.starskyhutchcalendar.net\/2019\/calendar\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/213\/revisions\/237"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/advent.starskyhutchcalendar.net\/2019\/calendar\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=213"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/advent.starskyhutchcalendar.net\/2019\/calendar\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=213"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/advent.starskyhutchcalendar.net\/2019\/calendar\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=213"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}