{"id":404,"date":"2020-12-22T05:06:53","date_gmt":"2020-12-22T05:06:53","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/advent.starskyhutchcalendar.net\/2020\/calendar\/?p=404"},"modified":"2020-12-22T05:06:53","modified_gmt":"2020-12-22T05:06:53","slug":"december-22nd-porno-pecker-pepper-pot-by-hilly","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/advent.starskyhutchcalendar.net\/2020\/calendar\/?p=404","title":{"rendered":"December 22nd- Porno Pecker Pepper Pot by Hilly"},"content":{"rendered":"

Another night, unbridled sex,
\nall sweaty skinned and steamy pecs,
\nmy man and I upon the rug,
\nabout to have another tug,
\nbut what is this, his willy gone?
\nThere’s nothing there to sit upon!<\/p>\n

Down to Ann Summers I must go,
\nbut when I ask they say ‘oh no,
\nright out of stock of willies dear
\nnew ones are coming out next year’.
\nAll down at heart and down at heel,
\nfrustrated I begin to feel,
\nto get another willy-now?<\/p>\n

And then I thought ‘imagination-you know how,
\nthe Farmer’s Market go, make haste’,
\nwith not a single sec to waste,
\nright there before me red and hot,
\nenticing, naughty ‘pepper pot’,
\na-peeping out beneath it’s sheath,
\nI licked my lips and bared my teeth,
\n‘I’ll have a bunch of those’ I said,
\ngot home and tucked them ‘neath the bed,
\nwhile in the dark we huff and puff,
\nmy man shouts out ‘that’s quite enough,
\njust get that porno pepper out!’<\/p>\n

I grabbed one that was firm and stout,
\n(how did he know I would secrete
\nthis naughty little sex toy treat?!)
\nWell, since that night things get real hot,
\njust me, my man and ‘pepper pot’.<\/p>\n

\"\"<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Another night<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[9,10,14],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-404","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-nsfw","category-poem","category-slash"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/advent.starskyhutchcalendar.net\/2020\/calendar\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/404","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/advent.starskyhutchcalendar.net\/2020\/calendar\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/advent.starskyhutchcalendar.net\/2020\/calendar\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/advent.starskyhutchcalendar.net\/2020\/calendar\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/advent.starskyhutchcalendar.net\/2020\/calendar\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=404"}],"version-history":[{"count":3,"href":"http:\/\/advent.starskyhutchcalendar.net\/2020\/calendar\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/404\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":536,"href":"http:\/\/advent.starskyhutchcalendar.net\/2020\/calendar\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/404\/revisions\/536"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/advent.starskyhutchcalendar.net\/2020\/calendar\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=404"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/advent.starskyhutchcalendar.net\/2020\/calendar\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=404"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/advent.starskyhutchcalendar.net\/2020\/calendar\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=404"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}