{"id":309,"date":"2015-12-24T07:26:57","date_gmt":"2015-12-24T07:26:57","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/advent.starskyhutchcalendar.net\/2015\/calendar\/?p=309"},"modified":"2015-12-24T07:26:57","modified_gmt":"2015-12-24T07:26:57","slug":"december-24th-them-by-d-p-patricks","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/advent.starskyhutchcalendar.net\/2015\/calendar\/?p=309","title":{"rendered":"December 24th- Them by D.P. Patricks"},"content":{"rendered":"

The idea for this story came to me at about 2am. When I hadn’t gotten back to sleep by 4, I got up and wrote it.<\/em><\/span><\/p>\n

“What’s wrong, Starsk? You seem kind of tense tonight.”<\/p>\n

“I’m just gettin’ a little tired of it, Hutch. That’s all.”<\/p>\n

“Tired of what?”<\/p>\n

“Them.”<\/p>\n

“‘Them’ who?”<\/p>\n

“Them!<\/i> The ones who’re watchin’ all the time. Lookin’ over our shoulders. Writin’ their stories and lettin’ their friends read ’em.”<\/p>\n

“Oh, them.”<\/p>\n

“Yeah. I mean, what’s wrong with all the other shows? Why do they have to write about us all the time?”<\/p>\n

“They don’t, Starsk. Fandom’s huge. There are millions of stories out there. Only a tiny proportion are about us.”<\/p>\n

“Well, ours are the only ones I know about.”<\/p>\n

“Good point.”
\n<\/p>\n

“What about ‘CHiPs’? Why don’t they\u2026.”<\/p>\n

“Uh, Starsk\u2026”<\/p>\n

“Yeah, bad example. Sorry. But seriously, Hutch, what’d be wrong with writing about, oh say, ‘Emergency’?”<\/p>\n

“I’m sure there are\u2026”<\/p>\n

“Gage and DeSoto. Now there was a team! Blond, dark, pals, buddies. Hmmm. I always wondered about them.”<\/p>\n

“Starsky\u2026”<\/p>\n

“Or better yet, ‘The Man From U.N.C.L.E’! I loved that show. Always thought there was something about that stuck-up Napoleon Solo I didn’t like though.”<\/p>\n

“Starsky\u2026!”<\/p>\n

“Kuryakin now, he was damn cute!”<\/p>\n

“Starsky!” <\/i><\/p>\n

“What? Awwww, is my Hutchiepoo jealous?”<\/p>\n

“I felt a twinge.”<\/p>\n

“I’m pullin’ your leg, babe. You gotta know you’re the only blond that does it for me. The only one that ever has. Or ever will.”<\/p>\n

“Good.”<\/p>\n

“He was too short anyway.”<\/p>\n

“True.”<\/p>\n

“‘Adam-12’ though. Now there was a series! Remember the one where Milner was trapped in his wrecked car?”<\/p>\n

“In a canyon\u2026”<\/p>\n

“In Griffith Park. Geez, Hutch, I just realized. That’s like what happened to you.”<\/p>\n

“In almost the same place.”<\/p>\n

“I’m sorry, love, didn’t mean to bring up\u2026”<\/p>\n

“Kent McCord found him.”<\/p>\n

“Yeah, he did.”<\/p>\n

“Just like you found me.”<\/p>\n

“‘We made it, partner’.”<\/p>\n

“We sure did, Starsk.”<\/p>\n

“My point is, Hutch, I’m startin’ to get a little self-conscious.”<\/p>\n

“I haven’t noticed any performance anxiety.”<\/p>\n

“Thanks, but I think that’s what I’m feelin’ sometimes. We never have a minute to ourselves. They’re always hoverin’, takin’ notes, writin’ stuff down.”<\/p>\n

“It’s called research, Starsk.”<\/p>\n

“I don’t care what it’s called! It’s an invasion of our privacy.”<\/p>\n

“They are quite persistent, aren’t they?”<\/p>\n

“I’ll say! They’re everywhere; here, your place, Metro, on stakeouts, in the squad room. I can’t even take a piss without one of ’em snickerin’.”<\/p>\n

“Are you sure it was snickering, Starsk? Always sounds more like a sigh to me.”<\/p>\n

“Yeah, well, you’re hung better ‘n I am.”<\/p>\n

“That’s not true, and you know it. We’re just\u2026 hung\u2026 differently.”<\/p>\n

“You’re long and fair and huge, Hutch. When you do me your cock reaches all the way to my heart.”<\/p>\n

“Aw, Starsk, I think that’s the sweetest thing you’ve ever said to me.”<\/p>\n

“It’s true, an’ just thinkin’ about it makes me want you inside me right now.”<\/p>\n

“That can be arranged.”<\/p>\n

“Not with them watchin’. Not this time.”<\/p>\n

“Starsky, think about this for a minute. If they didn’t write their stories, and let all their friends read them, we wouldn’t be here.”<\/p>\n

“What?”<\/p>\n

“We were only on for four seasons. A very long time ago. But we’re still around. We’re still young.”<\/p>\n

“Not all the time. We’re old<\/i> in some of the stories. We even die in some.”<\/p>\n

“Yes, sometimes. One or the other of us.”<\/p>\n

“That sucks.”<\/p>\n

“I know. But we’re younger in some of them, too.”<\/p>\n

“Yeah. The stories about you when you were a kid, growing up in Duluth? The times you spent with your grandfather. I love those.”<\/p>\n

“I love the ones about you when you were in Brooklyn.”<\/p>\n

“I’m sorry you didn’t get along too well with your parents, Hutch. Those stories hurt me.”<\/p>\n

“And I’m sorry you lost your father so young.”<\/p>\n

“Thanks, babe.”<\/p>\n

“We’re still here though, buddy. And as long as they keep writing their stories, we’ll stay here. Young, handsome, virile\u2026”<\/p>\n

“Successful cops, roundin’ up the bad guys and puttin’ ’em in jail.”<\/p>\n

“So that the court system can let them out.”<\/p>\n

“Don’t be stealin’ my thunder, Hutch. I’m the one in the grouchy mood.”<\/p>\n

“Anything I can do about that, pal?”<\/p>\n

“Leave your hand there for a second and we’ll see.”<\/p>\n

“Wipe that smirk off your face or I’ll do it for you.”<\/p>\n

“Like t’ see you try.”<\/p>\n

\"Christmas_Ornaments_Border_by_mickeyd600\"<\/a>“How was that?”<\/p>\n

“I think I love you.”<\/p>\n

“Oh Lord, do I hear a David Cassidy song there?”<\/p>\n

“Seems to me you do. Sing it for me, Hutch.”<\/p>\n

“No, Starsk, not now. I don’t even have my guitar.”<\/p>\n

“You don’t need the guitar. Sing it. Please?”<\/p>\n

I think I love you
\nSo what am I so afraid of?
\nI’m afraid that I’m not sure of
\nA love there is no cure for.<\/i><\/p>\n

I think I love you<\/em>
\n Isn’t that what life is made of?<\/em>
\n Though it worries me to say<\/em>
\n That I’ve never felt this way.<\/em><\/p>\n

I don’t know what I’m up against<\/em>
\n I don’t know what it’s all about<\/em>
\n I got so much to think about<\/em><\/p>\n

Believe me, you really don’t have to worry<\/em>
\n I only want to make you happy<\/em>
\n And, if you say, “Hey, go away,” I will<\/em>
\n But I think better still<\/em>
\n I’d better stay around and love you<\/em>
\n Do you think I have a case? Let me ask you to your face<\/em><\/p>\n

Do you think you love me?<\/em>
\n I think I love you<\/em>
\n I think I love you<\/em>
\n I think I love you<\/em><\/p>\n

“That’s what I wanted t’ hear, babe.”<\/p>\n

“Love you, Starsk.”<\/p>\n

“So, where were we?”<\/p>\n

“You were ranting about ‘them’ and I was trying to seduce you.”<\/p>\n

“Did you succeed?”<\/p>\n

“Not yet.”<\/p>\n

“Well, what’re you waitin’ for?”<\/p>\n

“A sign from you.”<\/p>\n

“Oh. You mean something like this?”<\/p>\n

“That’ll do. Shall we adjourn to the bedroom?”<\/p>\n

“After you.”<\/p>\n

“It won’t do any good to close the door, Starsk.”<\/p>\n

“I know, but it’ll make me feel better.”<\/p>\n

“Then, by all means, close it.”<\/p>\n

“Can I help with your clothes?”<\/p>\n

“Only if I can help with yours.”<\/p>\n

“Deal.”<\/p>\n

“God, Starsky, I never get over how beautiful you are. And it doesn’t seem to matter how old they write you in the stories, or how young. You’re just\u2026 beautiful.”<\/p>\n

“Ever look in the mirror, Blondie? Check the word ‘gorgeous’ in the dictionary and there’s a picture of you.”<\/p>\n

“Flatterer.”<\/p>\n

“Truth teller.”<\/p>\n

“We’ll discuss our mutual admiration society in the morning, okay? Right now, my curly-haired lover, I want to satisfy your every need.”<\/p>\n

“You’re makin’ a good start there, Hutch. More\u2026 a little lower\u2026 Ah, yeah, that’s sooooooo good.”<\/p>\n

“Still worried about them, Starsk?”<\/p>\n

“‘Them’ who?”<\/p>\n

END<\/p>\n

I Think I Love You<\/i> written by Gordon Strozier, Gerald Andre Valentine and Melvin Riley, Jr.<\/p>\n

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The idea for this story came to me at about 2am. When I hadn’t gotten back to sleep by 4, I got up and wrote it. “What’s wrong, Starsk? You seem kind of tense tonight.” “I’m just gettin’ a little … Continue reading →<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[5,12],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-309","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-fic","category-slash"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/advent.starskyhutchcalendar.net\/2015\/calendar\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/309","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/advent.starskyhutchcalendar.net\/2015\/calendar\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/advent.starskyhutchcalendar.net\/2015\/calendar\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/advent.starskyhutchcalendar.net\/2015\/calendar\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/advent.starskyhutchcalendar.net\/2015\/calendar\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=309"}],"version-history":[{"count":3,"href":"https:\/\/advent.starskyhutchcalendar.net\/2015\/calendar\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/309\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":313,"href":"https:\/\/advent.starskyhutchcalendar.net\/2015\/calendar\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/309\/revisions\/313"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/advent.starskyhutchcalendar.net\/2015\/calendar\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=309"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/advent.starskyhutchcalendar.net\/2015\/calendar\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=309"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/advent.starskyhutchcalendar.net\/2015\/calendar\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=309"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}