December 16th- Have Yourself A Merry Little Christmas by Renée/Starskinson

Author’s Note: In my timeline, the guys get into their relationship right after Bloodbath. That situation was the catalyst for their sexual relationship. That includes having them in a relationship after Little Girl Lost. I intentionally took liberties with the timeline of events in canon to fit this story.

Starsky lay in bed naked, stretching languidly as he awoke from sleep. Rolling on his side, he propped his head on his hand, taking in the handsome face of his lover in slumber while his other hand searched and quickly found his naked lover’s cock, under the covers. Starsky began to stroke it, watching for signs of him stirring.

Hutch stretched, moaning softly. His eyes slowly opened, to find his lover looking down at him, grinning.

“Mornin’.”

“Morning yourself, but I think I need to put a good in front of that, considering that you’re making it a very good morning for me.” Hutch moaned, as he could feel his pending orgasm rising.

Starsky didn’t respond. He just concentrated on bringing his lover off. He could tell Hutch was close, his face contorted, and his eyes were shut tight. Suddenly, cum poured all over his hand, as Hutch came hard.

Hutch opened his eyes, sighing loudly. “That was wonderful Starsk, but what’s the occasion?”

“Whadaya’ talkin’ about?” Starsky leaned over and grabbed a tissue off the nightstand to wipe his hand.

Hutch sat up. “The last time you woke me up like that was on my birthday and I know it isn’t my birthday, so what is it?”

Starsky sat crossed legged on the bed. “Well, it is that special time of year.”

“And what time of the year is that?”

Starsky blinked at his oblivious lover. “Hutch, do you mean to tell me you don’t know it’s Christmas in a few days?”

“Oh that.” Hutch placed an arm over his eyes.

“Yeah, oh that. Don’t tell me you’re still on that trip about not wantin’ to get caught up in euphoric sentimentalism.”

Hutch looked over at him. It had been a year since that day when he had told Starsky that he wasn’t going to fall for that. And since that day, there’s been some major changes to their relationship. They were now lovers and were sharing a house together. After Starsky had been kidnapped by that crazed cult, Hutch felt himself being more protective of his partner. That protectiveness brought feelings out in Hutch that he hadn’t realized was there all along. Starsky liked the attention Hutch was giving him. It made him feel loved and cared for, in a way that he never knew before. Soon, their true feelings for each other came to the surface. They had always loved each other– emotionally and physically. They were constantly touching each other, but one time that all changed. One night when Starsky was over at Hutch’s for dinner, that love turned sexual and their relationship has never been the same.

“Starsk, I did get you a Christmas gift, don’t you remember?”

“Oh yeah, I remember. You got me that certificate for a dumb tree in the park.”

“Starsk, that wasn’t a dumb tree. It was planted in your honor.”

“I don’t care. You knew I wanted a caboose for my train set.” He pouted, adorably.

“Wow, I had no idea you didn’t like it that much.”

“Well, at the time, I didn’t want to hurt your feelings.”

“But now it’s okay to hurt my feelings.”

Starsky looked at Hutch, sighing. “That’s not it Hutch– I was just disappointed and now you’re tellin’ me that you still feel the same way about Christmas.”

Hutch sat up and reached out for Starsky, but he moved closer to the edge of the bed out of reach.

“Come on Starsk– don’t get like this. I don’t feel the way I did last year about Christmas.”

Starsky looked back. “You don’t? Then why are you actin’ like you don’t care.”

“I care Starsk, it’s just that…”

“It’s just that what?” Starsky turned around to face Hutch.

Hutch rubbed the back of his neck, blowing out his breath. “It’s just that my family and I never really celebrated Christmas, so when I grew up, I just thought of it as just another day. I had to try to ignore the way the rest of the world felt.”

“I get that you might not want to celebrate, but why does it seem like you’re angry about it, huh?”

“I’m not angry. It’s that over the years, I’ve watched how people celebrate Christmas. The stores are filled with people spending money they don’t have, and everyone’s supposed to be happy.”

“It sounds to me like you still have a problem with euphoric sentimentalism.” Starsky raised his eyebrows at his lover.

Hutch thought about it. “I guess I do.”

“I don’t get it. After that wonderful moment last Christmas when Kiko’s mom adopted Molly– I thought it would have changed your attitude about Christmas.”

“Starsk, Kiko’s mom adopting Molly had nothing to do with Christmas.”

“Ahhh!” Starsky got off the bed and walked barefoot around the bedroom, grabbing his head in frustration.

“Starsk, there’s no reason to get so upset. It’s just the way I feel.”

Starsky stopped pacing and stood in front of Hutch. “Ya’ know, I’m gonna’ start callin’ you the Grinch. I suppose you’ll give me a horrible Christmas present again this year, if you give me one at all.”

“Starsk please…” Hutch reached out to touch his irate lover, but Starsky turned away. He went to the dresser and pulled out his cut-off jeans and a red shirt. He put them on, along with his sneakers.

“I gotta’ get outta’ here for a while.” Starsky walked out the front door, slamming it.

Hutch fell back on the bed, rubbing his hands over his face. All the years that he and Starsky were working partners, he always knew he loved Christmas. He had an adorable, child-like attachment to the season. He told Hutch that his mom was big on Christmas and decorating. Since his dad was killed, she wanted to make sure they still celebrated Christmas. They had a seven-foot tree that he and his brother got from a neighborhood tree lot and would bring it in their small apartment. The tree would almost take up their entire living room, but they made it work. They’d decorate it on Christmas Eve and she would let them open one gift each. His mother was an amazing woman– to be able to raise two kids alone, as well as make sure they still had a wonderful childhood.

Every Christmas, Starsky would be so excited. Hutch tried to be as excited, but he just didn’t feel it. Starsky would try to get him in the holiday spirit by making him watch all the Christmas movies, which made him feel worse. He’d take Hutch to a ski resort– even though he didn’t ski– just for the holiday ambiance. He would buy him a gift every Christmas– gifts that were thoughtful, and Hutch would always think up a reason why he didn’t. Last year was the first Christmas that he gave Starsky a gift and it wasn’t something that he really wanted.

Hutch felt bad that Starsky was so upset. Starsky thought that he had changed, but he hadn’t. He was still very cynical about Christmas, but the last thing he wanted was to cause his lover any distress. He got out of the bed and went into the shower. While he was drying himself off, he heard Starsky coming back in. Hutch wrapped a towel around his waist and one around his neck, then walked out of the bathroom, into the bedroom. He saw Starsky pulling his shirt over his head.

“Where’d ya’ go?” Hutch smiled, leaning against the door frame, holding onto the ends of the towel around his neck.

Starsky stopped, looked back, then continued to undress. “I went for a run.”

After stripping off all of his clothes, he went pass Hutch, then stopped just before he went in. “You finished with the bathroom?”

Hutch nodded, as he watched him disappear into the bathroom, shutting the door. He knew Starsky was still very upset. He took the towel from around his neck and rubbed it on his head, drying his hair. Then he walked barefoot to the dresser, pulled out an old pair of sweats and a t-shirt and put them on. He threw the wet towels on the floor, then went down to the kitchen. He needed to make it up to Starsky, so he decided to make his favorite breakfast– waffles, sausage, and scrambled eggs. He knew how much Starsky loved caramel, so whenever he made him coffee, he’d pour some caramel sauce in it.

Starsky got out of the shower and went to the dresser, pulled out a red t-shirt and his cutoff jeans and put them on, sans underwear and shoes. Hutch could hear stirring coming from the bedroom, so he knew Starsky was out of the shower. He wondered if he would come down to breakfast at all. Just then, he heard Starsky coming down the stairs. Hutch figured nothing– even anger– would stop him from eating. He looked back as he entered the kitchen.

“Hey, didn’t think you were comin’ down for breakfast, but I’m glad ya’ did. I’m making all your favorites.” Hutch sounded eager and happy, to try to put his lover in a better mood.

Starsky went to the cabinet, took down a glass, then opened the fridge, taking out a container of milk. He poured the milk into the glass, placed the milk back in the fridge, then grabbed a banana. “No thanks.”

Starsky went into the living room and sat down on the couch, putting his feet on the coffee table and began to eat his own breakfast.

Hutch lowered his head, closing his eyes. This was too much. He and Starsky needed to talk. Hutch put down the bowl of waffle batter, pulled off his apron, then went into the living room. He looked down at Starsky, who was ignoring him– watching TV, eating his banana, and drinking his milk. Hutch went over to the TV and shut it off.

“Hey! I was watchin’ that!” Starsky protested.

“We need to talk.” Hutch sat down next to him.

“There’s nothin’ to talk about. You don’t like Christmas. Now please turn the TV back on.”

“Starsk, it’s not that simple.”

Starsky glared at him, then got up to turn the TV back on. Once he did, he threw himself back down on the couch. Hutch immediately got up and turned it off again.

“I want the TV on!” Starsky was getting up to turn it on again, when Hutch grabbed his arm. Starsky wrenched his arm out of Hutch’s grip, then walked out of the living room.

“Starsk, please, let’s talk.” Hutch got up and followed Starsky into the kitchen. He watched him put the empty glass in the sink, then place his hands on it with his head down. Hutch moved behind him and placed a hand on his shoulder.

“It hurts, Hutch. I thought when we decided to be in a relationship, you’d always be there for me.”

“Starsky, I am always there for you, you know that.”

Starsky swung around, facing him. “No, you’re not. You know how much Christmas means to me, but you don’t want to celebrate it with me.”

“Starsky, will you please come back to the couch, so we can talk.” Hutch looked at his lover with gentle blue eyes and a charming heartwarming smile. Starsky could never resist it, so he turned and went back to sit on the couch. Hutch sat next to him, with Starsky waiting for him to speak.

“Starsk, I want to share your enthusiasm about Christmas…I really do.”

“So, what’s stoppin’ ya?”

“My memories.”

“Your memories? Whadaya’ mean?”

“Well, remember when I told you my family didn’t celebrate Christmas?”

“Yeah.”

“Well, there’s a reason.” Hutch looked over at Starsky, who was listening intently.

“I lied when I said I didn’t celebrate Christmas because I had a problem with all the euphoric sentimentalism. It’s really because when I was about ten-years-old, my father left home on Christmas Eve. He and my mother had a big fight and he hit her. When I tried to stop him, he threw me on the floor, then walked out. Christmas morning, my mother was so distraught she pushed over the decorated Christmas tree and destroyed all the gifts that were under it. Needless to say, we didn’t have a Christmas that year. The following years, she refused to celebrate because it brought back bad memories of my father.” Hutch paused for a moment to look at Starsky, who was looking at him with pain in his eyes.

Hutch continued, “He did come back two and a half years later and never told me or my mother where he was all that time. The sad thing was she took him back, without question. I hated him for what he did to my mother and our family. The first Christmas he was back, he suggested getting a tree, but my mother wouldn’t have it, so we never celebrated the holiday again. Now Christmas reminds me of that horrible time.”

Starsky stared off into space, thinking about what his lover had just said. He had no idea what happened to Hutch. No wonder he wouldn’t want to celebrate a holiday that brought up a painful time in his life. “Hutch, why didn’t you tell me this before? I would have understood.”

“I don’t know, Starsk. I should have. I guess I just wanted to make believe it hadn’t happened. I’m sorry that my trauma has caused you so much pain.” Hutch grabbed Starsky’s hand and brought it to his lips.

“No need to apologize, babe. I’m glad you finally told me.” Starsky leaned up and kissed Hutch, then looked into his eyes. “You mean so much to me. If celebrating Christmas is too painful for you, then we won’t celebrate it.”

Hutch leaned away from Starsky to look into his eyes. “No, Starsky, no! I’m not going to let that happen! It’s time that I let that shit go! I fell in love with someone who loves Christmas and I’m not gonna’ take that away from him. It would be very selfish of me. We will celebrate Christmas this year!” Hutch announced with confidence and excitement.

Starsky sat back with a look of shock. He’d never seen Hutch that excited about anything…other than that time he found something new to add to his smoothies. “Um, Hutch, is that what you really want to do?”

“Yes! Come on, let’s get ready to go!” Hutch got off the couch and headed up to their room, with Starsky following. Once there, he stepped out of his old sweat pants. He went to the closet and took out a pair of jeans and put them on, then grabbed his sneakers.

“What for?”

“What for?! So we can get Christmas stuff! This place needs decorating!”

“Hutch, are you okay? Ya’ got a fever or somethin’?” Starsky asked, concerned.

“I’m fine Starsk.” He grinned, lacing up his sneakers.

“Then why are you so suddenly in the holiday spirit?”

Hutch stopped dressing and turned towards his lover. “Starsk, like I said– I just realized that I need to stop avoiding Christmas. I need to stop allowing what happened to me to dictate the way I feel about Christmas for the rest of my life.”

Hutch moved closer to his lover. “Besides, my baby really loves Christmas and I’m not going to deny you that or anything.” Hutch pulled his baby to him, kissing him and squeezing his ass.

Starsky moaned, then groaned as Hutch moved away.

“If we start anything, we’ll never get outta’ here.”

Starsky was still a bit dumbfounded about Hutch, but he figured it was a good thing that he was finally in the holiday spirit. He didn’t know how long it would last, so he decided to stop doubting it and just go with it. He put on his sneakers and waited for Hutch by the door.

They got in the Torino, with Starsky behind the wheel. Before starting the car, Starsky looked over at Hutch. “So, where we goin’?”

“Just drive and I’ll direct ya’.”

Starsky narrowed his eyes, then started up the car and drove to wherever Hutch directed.

“Turn here.” Hutch pointed towards a Christmas tree lot. He directed him to pull into the parking lot.

“Whadaya’ we doin’ here? Starsky looked from the trees to Hutch’s face.

“What do you think we’re here for? A Christmas tree, dummy.” Hutch got out of the car, leaving Starsky looking astonished.

Hutch bent down to peer into the car window. “Are you coming? Come on.” Hutch grinned, then walked away. Starsky blinked twice, then got out of the car, and ran to catch up.

There were hundreds of trees– various shapes and sizes. Starsky walked through them in awe. “Wow! I’ve never seen so many trees! It’s like a forest!”

Hutch smiled at him. “Yeah, it is. Does this place look like the one you and your brother got your trees from?”

“No. This one is a lot bigger.” Starsky walked over to a tree, stood in front with his hands on his hips. “Hutch, c’mere.”

Hutch walked over and stood next to him. “It’s a beauty.”

“It looks just like one of the trees Nicky and I got for Mom.”

“Really? How tall do you think it is?” Hutch walked closer, touching the branches.

Starsky stood back. “Probably seven feet.”

Just then, a worker strolled by. “Excuse me. How big is this tree?”

The worker looked up at the tree. “It’s seven feet.”

“I knew it! Thank you.” He glanced at Hutch. “This is basically the same tree!”

“Excuse me!” Hutch called the same worker. “I’d like to buy this one,” he said, pointing to the tree.

Starsky blinked at Hutch with his mouth gaping open.

Hutch looked at him. “This is the one you want, isn’t it?”

“Yeah, but I didn’t mean you should buy it. It must cost a fortune?”

Hutch looked at the tag. “Since I’ve never really bought one before I wouldn’t know, but this one doesn’t seem too expensive. Besides, it’s the one you want.”

“Hutch, I know you’re tryin’ to make up for bein’ a Grinch and all, but we don’t have ta go into hock for you to do it.”

“Starsk, don’t worry about it. I do our budget, remember? We can afford it,” Hutch reassured with a smile.

“Okay– if you say so.” A big grin appeared on Starsky’s face.

After paying for the tree, a worker helped them tie the tree to the top of the Torino.

Starsky began to pace and rant about the tree possibly damaging his precious car. “I hope the tree won’t damage the paint.” Starsky looked closely, investigating it for scratches. “We should have taken your car. If the tree did any damage, no one could tell.”

Hutch made a face at him. “Get in the car.”

Starsky got behind the wheel and drove them back to their house. Once there, they began to untie the ropes that held the tree on the roof.

Hutch stood back, wondering how they were going to get the thing inside. “You have experience doing this– how are we gonna’ get the tree into the house?”

“We’re gonna’ carry it.”

“I know that…but how?”

Starsky thought about it for a minute. “You take the base and I’ll take the top.”

Together, they took the tree off the roof of the car and struggled to get a hold of it.

“I got it, I got it!” Hutch yelled, as the base of the tree almost slipped out of his hand.

“Go slow.” Starsky led them up to the front door.

“We’re gonna’ have to put the tree down to open the door,” Hutch said, lowering his end of the tree to the ground.

“Okay– you get the door open while I keep my end up.” Starsky was buried in the tree branches, trying to keep the tree from falling on top of him. “Hurry up, I’m losin’ my grip!”

Hutch hurriedly took the key from over the door frame, opened the door, then ran back to his end of the tree. He lifted it and Starsky guided the top of the tree into the house.

“Where are we gonna’ put it?” Starsky asked, struggling to keep the top of the tree up.

“How ’bout that spot in front of the bay window?”

They carried the tree to that spot, then Starsky realized something… “The guy gave us a tree stand and we left it in the car. I’ll go get it.” Starsky laid the top of the tree down, then ran out to the car.

When he got back with the stand, Hutch was struggling to keep the base up.

Starsky grabbed the tree in the middle, lifting it up. “We have to get it in the stand,” Starsky panted.

“How are we supposed to do that?”

“Well, we gotta figure a way, cause we can’t just leave it on the floor. I’ll continue to hold up the middle of the tree, while you try to lift the base and get it into the stand?” Starsky suggested.

“Okay. I can give it a try.” Hutch lifted the base, while Starsky guided the middle over the stand. “Help me lift it up.”

Starsky raised the tree, firmly grabbing the middle, while Hutch lifted the base, guiding it into the stand. After it dropped in, Starsky stretched out on the floor, exhausted. Hutch fell near him, and they both laid there breathing hard.

“Was it that hard when you and your brother did it?” Hutch panted.

“Well, I was fifteen and Nick was twelve, so yeah it was hard.”

“Was it worth it?”

Starsky sat up. “Oh yeah! Once the tree was all decorated with lights and ornaments, it was worth all the trouble of gettin’ it in our apartment.”

Starsky’s eyes widened, as something suddenly dawned on him.

“What’s the matter?” Hutch asked, sitting up.

“We didn’t buy any ornaments or lights!”

“I’m too tired to go back out now. Let’s get ’em tomorrow, okay?” Hutch got himself up off the floor, with a groan.

“Okay, but first thing. I don’t want all the good ornaments to be gone.”

They both stepped back to look at the tree.

“Do you think it looks good there?” Hutch asked, pulling Starsky close.

“Yeah, it looks great! Everyone can see it from the outside.” Starsky looked at his lover. “Thanks babe.”

“Thanks for what?”

“For everything– gettin’ this very special tree and for wantin’ to celebrate Christmas with me.” He gave Hutch a passionate kiss, then they fell into an embrace.

“It’s my pleasure Starsk. I love you.”

“I love you too.”

They stood holding each other as they continued to admire their tree.

“It really is a gorgeous tree,” Hutch smiled.

“Hutch, I think this is the most beautiful tree I’ve ever seen.”

Hutch moved back to look. “Wow, it really is! The only thing missing is a tree topper.”

“Yeah, you’re right. We forgot to get one,” Starsky said with regret.

“Wait…I think I have something we can use.”

Starsky watched as Hutch ran to the closet. He took out a box and placed it on the coffee table. He opened it, and began to rummage through it, searching for something.

“Whatcha’ lookin’ for?” Starsky walked closer to peer inside the box.

“It has to be in here.” Hutch continued to pull out various items from the box, letting them fall on the table and the floor. Suddenly, he stopped. “Found it.”

“Found what?”

“This.” Hutch held up a beautiful angel, dressed all in white with gold wings and a gold halo on top of its long blonde hair.

“That’s beautiful Hutch! Where did it come from?”

“My mother– when she didn’t want to celebrate Christmas anymore, she placed all the decorations in a big box to throw out. When she wasn’t looking, I looked inside the box and saw this angel. We had it on top of every tree we had. For some reason, I didn’t want it thrown away, so I took it out and hid it. Somehow, I managed to keep it all these years.”

“It’s perfect for the top of our tree.” Starsky went to get a step stool for Hutch to use. “Go ahead– put it on top.”

Hutch smiled at his lover with tears in his eyes, then stepped up on the stool. He placed the angel on top of the tree, then looked down at Starsky. “How does it look? Is it straight?”

Starsky stepped back to get a good look. “A little to the left.”

Hutch moved it over. “How’s that?”

“Perfect! Come take a look.”

Hutch stepped down and stood beside Starsky, with their arms wrapped around each other.

“Wow, Starsk, it looks amazing!”

“Especially with your mom’s angel on top.” Starsky rubbed small circles on Hutch’s back.

Hutch looked at Starsky letting the tears fall. Starsky raised his hand, and gently wiped away the tears with his thumb.

“Thank you,” Hutch said softly.

“For what?”

“For all of this and for helping me get in the holiday spirit.” Hutch turned and tenderly touched his lips to Starsky’s.

“It’s my pleasure babe.” Starsky smiled, giving Hutch a more passionate kiss that took both their breaths away.

They placed a hand on each other’s butt, as they climbed the stairs to their bedroom, shutting the door behind them.